From my Tender Mercies Journal dated May 14, 2009
Derek Jasper died in a tragic car accident on April 22nd. Experiencing the past three weeks with our dear friends has been emotional for us. The day after the funeral I pretty much fell apart, crying hard, and frequently. That night I told Heavenly Father that I wasn't doing very well, that even though He had given me so many tender mercies, I needed one more.
The next morning, I did an unusual thing; I turned on the TV. Because I had spent all my spare time the day before working on a picture video for the Jaspers, I hadn't gotten my laundry folded. So, as I waited for Nate to shower and dress so we could take Brody (our dog) for a walk, I folded whites on the couch in front of the TV. I was repeatedly pushing the channel up button on my way to HGTV, but as I hit KBYU, before I could press the button again, I heard, "Stop. Stay here." I obeyed. There was Pres. Eyring speaking. The first complete sentence I heard was "We can feel overcome with pain and sorrow at the death of a loved one." He had my full attention.
I later found the talk on line. It's titled, The Power of Deliverance. I printed it out and underlined several gems such as these:
"Life ends early for some. Each of us will be tested by facing the death of someone we love. The hardest part of that test is to know what to do with the sorrow, the loneliness, and the loss that can feel as if a part of us has been lost. Grief can persist like a chronic ache. And for some there may be feelings of anger or injustice."
"Good people around you will try to understand your grief at the passing of a loved one. They may feel grief themselves. The Savior not only understands and feels grief but also feels your personal grief that only you feel. And He knows you perfectly. He knows your heart. So He can know which of the many things you can do that will be best for you as you invite the Holy Ghost to comfort and bless you. He will know where it is best for you to start. Sometimes it will be to pray. It might be to go to comfort someone else."
"By the inspiration of the Spirit we can have a testimony of the Resurrection and a clear view of the glorious reunion ahead. I have felt that comfort as I looked down at the gravestone of someone I knew - someone that I know I can at some future time hold in my arms. Knowing that, I was not only delivered from grief but was filled with happy anticipation."
It was as if after asking Heavenly Father for help, he took my hand, sat me down on his lap, put an arm around my shoulder and spoke directly to my soul.